Coping with a Setback


Setbacks are an inevitable part of life.  Expect them and accept them as learning experiences. No one likes to experience a setback in life.  No one likes to start all over again. Resilient people know that failures and mistakes are not dead-ends.  People become resilient and recover from setbacks because they don’t let failures and mistakes stop them—they use them as learning experiences.  Obstacles can become opportunities for growth.

None of us know what the future holds.  If God told you all the blessings and possibilities coming your way, you might not believe it or you might sabotage it because you don’t feel worthy or ready.

Do you feel like your setbacks are permanent or a form of punishment?  Maybe you are like an arrow in God’s hand and you are about to be launched into a brighter future and new possibilities you can’t even imagine.  Hold on and trust God.  Your setback could be a setup for a stronger comeback.  Your attitude, actions, courage and faith are determining the trajectory of your future.

When life brings you situations that you can’t control or change … the change will change you.  The shift will shake your faith.  The question is, “How will you be changed?  Will you be bitter or better?  Will you get stuck in your pain or will you be self-motivated to press and persevere?  Will you live with shame, anger or blame or will you become super intentional to learn the lessons so you won’t have to repeat them?  Will you become more compassionate, discerning, and proactive or will you start acting like a powerless victim?  Will you find your voice or will you become helpless and passive?  Will you have more faith or have more fear and anxiety?  Will you be crushed by the weight of life’s demands, trials and tribulations or rise and be resilient?

“Be of good courage and He shall strengthen your heart.”          (Psalm 31:24)

No matter how good a person you are or how much preparation you make… stuff happens.  No matter how strong the attack, be still and Trust God. You may be experiencing envy, threats from bill collectors, loneliness, heart ache or wondering how you will get through your season of drought.

Connect with loved ones.  Keep your perspective.  Help others.   Feel gratitude.  Nothing raises your energy higher than offering prayers of thanks for what you have.  Learn from the situation.  Your situation may really be quite horrible but what’s worse is to fall into the same trap again.  If you just left an abusive relationship, learn from it and don’t get into another one.  If you just got fired, figure out what you really want to be doing and see it as an opportunity to find something better.  If you think low self esteem got you into the situation, work on improving your self esteem.  What you don’t want to do is beat yourself up after someone else has already beaten you up.  That serves no purpose.  If you start hearing thoughts in your head like, “I’m just a failure,” or “I’m not worthy of love,” or “Who is going to hire me now?”, stop the negative thinking.  That’s fear talking.  Negative, fearful and worry thoughts will anchor your feet under the water and you’ll drown.  If you pray, don’t worry.  If you’re going to worry, you cancel out the power of prayer.  Take care of yourself.  Take some time to do something joyful.  See a movie, take a walk, call a good friend, get a spa treatment, dine at your favorite restaurant.   Shift happens.  Don’t allow any setbacks, shaking, and shifting in your life cause you to give up.  Read more in my book “Shift Happens.” ~ Jewel Diamond Taylor, The Self-esteem Dr., Founder of Women on the Grow, author, Life Coach, Minister and Women’s Retreat Leader for over 20 years.

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3 comments

  1. Good morning……. I just need to say thank you….. God has put my eyes in the right direction today, leading me right to you….. I just read this and it feels as if you were talking to me…. I really needed that message right now in my life……once again THANK YOU….

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