What triggers you?

QUESTION: Why do you emphasize teaching emotional health in your talks, books, and coaching/counseling?

ANSWER: Many triggers that are not understood or healed sets off an old memory. These triggers can sabotage your relationships, job, marriage, goals, maturity, peace of mind, and create addictions. We have a tape of everything and anything in our brain that has ever happened to us. Triggers can cause a flashback of a time that was traumatic for you. Often these flashbacks are induced by your five senses. When this happens, it takes us back to a time when we first felt upset. One of my main triggers that I am aware of, developed when I was 7 years old when my mother left my father and moved our family from my birthplace in Washington DC on Otis Street to Magnolia Street in Compton, CA. The trauma of separation and seeing the very intense drama of crying, screaming, and arguing unfold and seeing the emotional pain of my father separated from his wife and children is something that still triggers me in many ways. That experience ended my childhood of playfulness. I became an “adult child” unknowingly taking on the responsibility of the peacemaker, rescuer, fixer, and nurturer. That experience is an implicit and strong memory. I am triggered when I see others in pain. This trigger, on one hand, taught me compassion for others and on the other hand, I have learned that I can’t always help and respond to everyone’s pain. The awareness of my trigger helps me to have a healthy balance.
You may have an unconscious memory (eg. divorce, abuse, rape, poverty, job harassment, fight, loss of a loved one, prison, military, foreclosure, car accident, parents addiction, embarrassment, shame, childhood neglect) that triggers you and you don’t understand why certain people, things, voices, smells, or sounds set you off or cause you to withdraw, act out, drink, eat, escape, shop, argue, or rebel.
Unresolved trauma can stunt your growth, peace, and emotional/mental stability.
My books, keynotes, and counseling/coaching style help my clients/audiences to connect the dots between their triggers, behaviors, beliefs, habits, choices, past trauma, environment, programming from family/culture/society, expectations, and results.

I am offering my webinar Saturday, Apri 25, 2020

1:00 pm (pacific time)

only $20.20 per person  click here to register

Call me for your one-on-one video or phone session, 323.964.1736 or email Jewelmotivates@gmail.com
I will return to face-to-face sessions when this shutdown is over.


The Great Lie/Myth About Motivation

There is a great myth and lie about motivation. What’s motivation got to do with you achieving your goal?… very little if you don’t take consistent action, and have the belief that what you are seeking is possible.
You may get hyped up at a conference, church, sales meeting, etc. Many times we get motivated after a keynote, seminar, or sermon and then return right back to our old way of thinking and living. The word of God teaches, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Romans 12:2. In order to experience transformation and success, your mind has to be transformed from stinking thinking, limitation, fear, worry, anger, shame, bitterness, resentment, selfishness, resistance, low self-esteem, past hurts, misguided and dysfunctional influences.
The energy and enthusiasm will eventually wane. Motivation dissolves and fluctuates depending on your environment, circumstances and shifts that arise. Winners develop mental toughness for discipline.
You need momentum, not motivation.
Action = momentum, feelings = motivation.
If your goal is to stay on a diet, find a job/home, save money, write a book, go to the gym, finish your college studies, meet your sales goal, save money, declutter your environment, learn a new skill set, or go on a fast…you need momentum. Consistent action, step by step, create momentum.
So you’re not feeling it … too bad. The reason so many are fascinated about amazing athletes is because they show up and push past their pain to make that touchdown, goal, slam dunk, or home run. They can’t afford to take their feelings with them when it’s game time.
You don’t have the luxury to allow your feelings to get in the way and sabotage your plan, progress, intentions, goals, purpose, blessings, rewards, and breakthroughs. Feelings will fool you and paralyze you. Feelings can lie and stop you. Feelings can put mud in your wings. No wonder Solomon taught us in the Bible to guard our hearts.
The beginning task of going after a goal may seem emotionally/physically painful, awkward, or inconvenient. You hit a psychological ceiling and sabotage your momentum to complete a task .
You may feel like you are missing something.
You may be tempted to stop.
You may feel incompetent, ashamed, unworthy, or too afraid to ask for help, go on that interview, or make that call.
You will feel uneasy because you are out of your comfort zone.
You may hate; eating certain foods, doing certain physical exercises, meeting new people, going to new places, starting a new project or business, driving long distances, changing your routine, doing paperwork, changing who you gets your time, or downsizing your spending.
If you remain steadfast to meet your goals even though you don’t enjoy it…now that’s truly a motivated person. Be aware that your brain will resist new habits. You must be consistent and steadfast to re-map your mind to follow a new path … a path that leads to success.
If you get up and still do what you don’t like because;
you want to accomplish that bodyweight goal,
you want to increase your savings to purchase that car, home, or become debt-free,
you want to restore your health,
you want to travel,
you want to retire,
you want to increase your credit score,
you want to graduate,
you want to be a homeowner,
you want to start your business, you want to reach a sales goal… if you don’t stop anyway… then you are truly motivated.
Consistent momentum of sticking with your plan is the key. Stick, don’t quit.
Don’t believe you are a failure because you are not feeling pumped, excited, and motivated all the time to do what you need to do. Enthusiasm will come and go. You can’t have fear and focus at the same time. Procrastination is your thief. Your consistent steps and dedication are the keys to achieving your success
Redefine what motivation looks like and feels like. As you keep the main thing, the main thing, even though it is painful, and you feel like you’re missing out on that shoe sale, that party, the pizza, the candy, the donuts, or that temporary high…your discipline and consistent momentum will give you a great emotional payday.
Land mines are concealed under or on the ground and designed to destroy or disable enemy targets.
Watch out for your landMINDs that will trip you up and destroy your momentum (e.g. distractions, procrastination, low self-worth, dream killers, energy vampires, sleep deprivation, concerned about other people’s expectations, poor nutrition, past experiences, perfectionism, feeling unworthy, too much TV, social media). One day you will thank yourself for NOT giving up.

excerpt from e-book “GOALMind Power – Pearls of Wisdom” by Jewel Diamond Taylor, click here to receive this amazing and helpful resource for your toolbox for success $11.99 click here to receive your copy

Jewel, I want to continue learning on a regular basis from your treasure chest of knowledge. I want to prioritize my time, effort, and dedication to live my best life. Please sign me up to participate in your on-line GoalMind Academy.
For info to register. email JewelMotivates@gmail.com

Watch “Women on the Grow Praise Report (overcoming painful childhood, dysfunction, parents alcoholism)” on YouTube

Do you ever feel like you don’t fit in?

“Are you introverted? Are you the hyper one or do you feel social activities are exhausting? Are you the talker or the quiet one? Are you fine staying home or are you a social butterfly? Do you try too hard to fit in? Do you feel out of touch with the people you work with?  Does your family think you are the “odd one”?  Do you enjoy different activities than your peers around you?  Do you spend your time feeling like you don’t fit in?  Do you feel like everyone around you has a better social life? Do you feel people just don’t “get you”? Do you worry too much about what other people think? Do you feel out of place in your job, church, or family?
Start being confident about your unique personality. Own it.  Don’t apologize for your taste, talent, time, and truth.
Your emotional wellness comes from being confident in yourself and not seeking approval from others.
You can’t please everybody.  If you realize that you do have some anxieties, past trauma, self-esteem issues or have traits that create social awkwardness and isolation…be honest with yourself.  Seek help and support.  Be strong enough in yourself not to feel unworthy, invisible, defeated, rejected, or an outcast. Your tribe exists. Your personality traits, quirkiness, and strengths are your unique footprint.  So walk in it!  The more authentic you are…the more likely you will attract “your people.”  The more you honor and respect yourself, you will learn to honor and respect the differences in other people without harsh judgment.
You are uniquely created.  There is no one else like you.  It’s not your job to make people like you…learn how to like yourself.” Jewel Diamond Taylor, Conference Speaker, Author, Life Coach, Emotional Wellness Educator, The Self-esteem Dr.

Covid-19 – Deep breathing exercise tool

Deep breathing is one of the best ways to lower stress in the body.  (see below).

When you breathe deeply, it sends a message to your brain to calm down and relax. The brain then sends this message to your body. … Breathing exercises are a good way to relax, reduce tension, and relieve stress.

The next time you’re feeling anxious try this simple relaxation technique:
  • Inhale slowly and deeply through your nose. Keep your shoulders relaxed. …
  • Exhale slowly through your mouth. As you blow air out, purse your lips slightly, but keep your jaw relaxed. …
  • Repeat this breathing exercise for several minutes.

COVID-19 – Thinking Out Loud

Thinking out loud,..

During my time of stillness, reflection, and missing family and friends…I have NO regrets. I am glad I already spent my life;
1. Showing my love and appreciation to others.
2. I always showed love by hugging my family and friends so I don’t feel regrets if I don’t see them for a while.
3. I didn’t procrastinate about traveling. I have a lot of travel memories to keep me warm.
4. I know how to cook. I’m not missing fast food or risking my health.
5. I always had the habit of reaching out to others.
6. I always prayed and meditated which keeps my anxiety down.
7. I am an ambivert so I am not restless staying home.
8. I learned coping skills so I don’t need a crash course.
9. I have plenty of books in my house to read.
10. I already practiced morning rituals of stretching, nasal cleanse, daily herbal supplements and drinking water without ice.
11. Losing many loved ones taught me to be resilient and appreciate each day, even in a crisis. I know life is fragile. Losing my parents, in-laws, friends and my 38 yr old son JJ taught me about the impermanence of life. My mental toughness, faith in God, and past pain have taught me to accept the uncertainties and the unpredictable suffering in life and to also expect miracles.
12. I’m grateful for the technology and awareness in the past to take many videos and pictures with my phone. Re-visiting them is my self-care and acts of self-soothing. I continue to take advantage of real-time video apps to see my loved ones.
13. Stress can bring out the worst or the best in people. I thank God for discernment, protection, peace, resiliency, emotional wellness, and feet to my faith.

Wash your hands, be safe, pray, be kind, conserve your energy, be hopeful and practice gratitude,

Jewel Diamond Taylor

Covid-19 How to Cope With Anxiety Attacks

 

I continue to offer my coaching/counseling (phone or video) by sharing coping skills, my experience, prayer, and emotional wellness support.
During this crisis there NO fee.  A love offering is available by cash app or paypal.
Contact email – JewelMotivates@gmail.com, call 323.964.1736

Wash your hands, be safe, pray, be kind, conserve your energy, be hopeful, and practice gratitude.

 

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