In my coaching and counseling sessions I’m hearing a lot of conversations from women who are feeling unworthy, unhappy, depressed, and questioning their lives. Social media posts of weddings, travel vacations, books sales, events, cars, people booed-up, new homes, college graduates, entrepreneurs, marriages, proposals, weight loss, clothes, eyelashes, shoes, etc. are creating a new phenomena of toxic comparison. The pressure to perform and produce to keep up and cover up a sense of “not enoughness” is leading to relationship and marriage breakups, high debt, multiple harmful surgeries, depression, and self-esteem crash and burns.
With the overexposure of social media and people posting their managed image and often exaggerated posts…we are seeing a dramatic increase of people feeling inadequate, stressed, and in high-gear driven to have more and do more.
One must ask these questions. 1) Is what I’m seeing authentic and real? 2) If it is, why am I unable to be happy for other people’s success? 3) Am I realizing I am insecure and need to work on my personal growth? 4) Do I live in fear, lack, and jealousy? 5) Am I practicing good habits of productivity or procrastination? 6) Am I more concerned about what other people think and strive for perfection instead of progress? 7) If what I am coveting is real, am I willing to sacrifice, work, study, and cope with the responsibility that comes with any new level of well-being, satisfaction, success? Social media tends to show the success and finish line… but not show the back story… the mess, the struggle, the heart ache, losses, the setbacks and attacks, the sacrifice, the bumps, bruises, and the obstacles that were behind the posted photos.
The feelings of comparison is spreading like a cancer and steals a person’s peace, gratitude, contentment, joy, and self-esteem.
If you are interested in attending, email – JewelMotivates@gmail.com to check on the status of registrations before making your AMTRAK reservation. As of now, this excursion is almost sold out.
PLEASE NOTE YOU HAVE TO PURCHASE YOUR DEPARTURE AND RETURN AMTRAK TICKETS SEPARATELY.
2. This is the separate link to register for the luncheon event activities$65 per personclick here
Depart Union Station Los Angeles to San Diego (Santa Fe Depot) Pacific Surfliner 768 – $55 Business – Saturday, September 18, 2021
Return Saturday, September 18, 2021 from San Diego (Santa Fe Depot) Pacific Surfliner 593 – Business $55
$65 per person includes Full menu buffet lunch, tax, gratuity, gift bag goodies, and inspirational presentation from Jewel Diamond Taylor – private dining/meeting area at the beautiful Best Western Island Palms Plus Hotel and Marina, Shelter Island, San Diego Click here to view our beautiful hotel & marina
2. After you make your Amtrak reservation use this link to register for your lunch and inspirational gatHERing presented by your host Jewel Diamond Taylor, Founder of Women on the Grow, Inc.
2. Be sure to provide your active and current email address for updates. 3. Be sure to check your email the week before our excursion to be informed of any updates. 4. Our attire theme for the day is blue and/or white. 5. Please provide your current text number for any updates. 6. If you have any questions, reply to this email or text/call 310.526.2552.
We look forward to seeing you and enjoying a wonderful one-day getaway gatHERing of beauty, fun, nature, sunshine, laughter, sisterhood, relaxation, inspiration, and a self-care gift to yourself!
Jewel Diamond Taylor, Founder/President of Women on the Grow, Inc. Joy Lewis, Vice-President, Women on the Grow, Inc. 501c3
5 things to remember to manifest your next level of breakthrough and success…
1. Speak it before you see it. Your words have power.
2. Visualize it…be specific.
3. Think and ink it. Write it down and review often.
4. Seek accountability and support (e.g. mentor, life coach)
5. Give God thanks in advance. Take action with expectancy and gratitude.
Hello Jewel,”Thank you so much for all your wisdom, knowledge & gifts of the spirit. I came to you needing to get unstuck. My plan is to retire in a few years & you said to me narrow my mind &vision & get focused. In the back of my mind, there are all of these voices speaking to me. (e.g. What about this what about that and so on.) I needed to talk with someone who would not judge me & who could give a different perspective on my concerns. Your energy & positive words have helped me to focus better on my goals & desires of my heart. I am better at focusing & trusting God and have you now as an accountability partner.” – F.C.M.
Some people survive and talk about it. Some people survive tough times and remain silent. Some people deal with unimaginable pain in their own life.
So, the next time you look at someone’s life covetously, or feel your life is inadequate compared to their life…remember you may not be able to endure their experience. You may not know the cost of their alabaster box. So, while someone sits before you looking calm like an ocean on a sunny day, think about this. The ocean is vast and wide. One part of the ocean can be calm while another part of the ocean could be experiencing a colossal storm. It’s happening on the same ocean.
The voice of shame and low self-esteem say, “I’m not good enough.” “Who do you think you are?” I’m not worth it.” “I’m not lovable, beautiful, smart, good, capable, etc.”
Are you frustrated and feel your progress of healing from a broken relationship, financial setback, job loss, trauma, or illness, depression, or setback in your life is not happening fast enough? Your breakthrough and healing are NOT linear. There will be ups and downs. In order to heal, you have to become comfortable facing your uncomfortable reality. Don’t depress your feelings, express your feelings. Let the feelings come. Don’t run, hide, deny, numb, or minimize your feelings. There will be moments of feeling stagnant and triggers that may cause you to feel defeated or fearful.
The support I offer through my one-on-one sessions and books are curated to inspire others to find the hope, courage, will, and strength to discover the depths of their faith, courage, and resiliency they never knew they possess.
I pray you learn to create a sanctuary within yourself, not a prison. Create inside yourself a place, a knowing, a safe place where the pain, anger, grief, and world news cannot disturb your peace. It will not be easy, but it is possible. You can’t be rushed, forced, or manipulated to start or stay with it. Your mind can come up with a lot of ways to protect you (e.g. blame, avoidance, denial, feeling helpless, ashamed and guilty, fake smiles, minimization, isolation, busyness, suppress or medicate your feelings with food, drugs, alcohol, sex, shopping, gambling, helping others).
You have to be ready and hopeful. You must feel worthy of healing. One day you will thank yourself for not giving up. Ready, set, grow! Stay in the light. – Jewel Diamond Taylor
“Jewel my session with you today helped me tremendously to cope in a more productive way with the harassment and racism I am experiencing on my job. I have been so angry, stressed, and fearful of losing my job. You helped me to see how to manage my emotions, guard my heart and self-worth, and to see how the game of micro-aggressions were trying to push my buttons and give them justification to fire me. With each session you have been empowering me to find my voice and stand my ground.” – K. A., Los Angeles, CA
Good morning Jewel,
On behalf of the Administrative Professionals Day planning committee, thank you for speaking during our 23nd annual FDIC Administrative Professional Day Program. We appreciated your encouraging words and advice on how to protect our mental health and adjust to change in a constantly changing world. We have received lots of great feedback and people are asking for the recording to watch it again! Again thank you for speaking at the 2021 Administrative Professionals Day Program. We truly appreciate it.
Human Resources Branch/ DOA Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation Arlington, VA
Feedback from a MARRIED COUPLE who are receiving weekly counseling with the Self-esteem Dr. Jewel Diamond Taylor:
I’m realizing the dysfunctional relationship I have had for so many years of rejections and criticism from mother has effected my marriage. You have helped me to understand why I am so hard on myself and constantly trying to prove my love to my wife.
My wife and I learned some real good communication skills. We can see a difference in the way we are dealing with our disagreements…I am learning to respond and not react.
I can really see a difference in my husband. I can see he is really tryiing to change and think before he blows up with anxiety and impatience.
We are learning how to be more honest about our feelings and triggers. Thank you Dr. Jewel for these weekly sessions. We are telling other couples about your counseling service.
Feedback from SEVERAL WOMEN who share their takeway from their sessions with The Self-esteem Dr. Jewel Diamond Taylor:
. I am more of an avoidant mom than a smothering mom. I don’t like feeling smothered or too bothered and I get overwhelmed with conflict or responsibility because I was such a young mom and I was a single mom for most of my children’s lives so I avoid stuff to protect my self.
. My parents did they best they could but I didnt have a perfect model of parenting and I am parenting from some of those same flawed parenting techniques.
. I may have wrong expectations about the type of parent I can be and I need to practice more self compassion.
. I am struggling to confront and draw boundaries with my mother who is manipulative, emotionally distant, and shows me no respect. You are helping me to accept the reality of her personality and this dysfunctional relationship. I am drained emotionally and it is affecting other areas of my life.
. As a young woman who had a lot of bad decisions with men, you are giving me guidance and helping me to move forward after some deep depression, feeling suicidal, angry, and ashamed. I’m so glad my Grandmother referred me to you for counseling and coaching. I now have 2 new jobs and accepted to go go to community college.
. I can feel the pain but I don’t have to feed it. (For me the feeding is with shopping and eating, and I buying my kids stuff so they wont feel pain and I wont feel guilty.)
. No more secrets I don’t have to be ashamed of my past. I can be vulnerable and transparent, it is freeing!
. I am gaining so much clarity and feeling free from guilt, shame , and always being the giver, fixer, and go-to person in my family. It’s my time now to start finding out what I want, need, and deserve. My life has been about helping everybody for so many years and now these sessions are strengthening my self-esteem and I’m taking some positive actions to let go and reduce the drama and stress I’ve been feeling for years.
. Generational patterns are repeating themselves, I’m seeing my daughters are making some of my same mistakes. Divorce, unwed mom, being with men that are broken and don’t value selves and finding men that don’t value them.
. I share too much business with my children because I haven’t had a spouse for many years.
. You helped me to see that we can shine on our jobs and fail at home.
. I need to recognize and acknowledge the things I was running from or I will leave a trail behind me.It may make me uncomfortable at first but it is liberating.
To contact The Self-esteem Dr. Jewel Diamond Taylor for one-on-one life coaching or counseling, email – JewelMotivates@gmail.com or call 323.964.1736
Wednesday, April 28,4:00 pm (Pacific) onThe Blend Talk Show facebook page. Season 2 is everything you need to know to start healing from the impact that #covıd 19 has had on your mind, body, and spirit.
The Self-esteem Dr. Jewel Diamond Taylor will be a speaker for The Wellness Group – Breast Health Awareness celebrating 20 Years of Empowering Women! The Wellness Group presents our 20th Annual Healthy Lifestyle Forum, “Embrace the Woman You Are,” on Saturday, May 1, from 10 a.m. to 11:30 a.m., via Zoom. The event will offer dynamic and powerful presentations, educational materials, product samples, gifts and prizes. Admission is free with registration. To register, visit https://twg20thannualhealthylifestyleforum.eventbrite.com Space is Limited! Register Today!
If you have a cold, the flu, a cut, stomach ache, head ache or nausea… you probably have some of these in your medicine cabinet. But do you have the tools to deal with your emotional pain of worry, shame, childhood abuse, anger, depression, regrets, grief, disappointments, loneliness, feeling unworthy, fears, doubts, low self-esteem, procrastination or feeling stressed? When we are hurt physically in our bodies…we don’t hesitate to seek relief. But why do we ignore our emotional pain (mind/heart)? Fear of being judged and ridiculed by your family, friends, church, job, and society can make feel shame…which only complicates and prolongs your ability to heal and thrive. Did you realize your emotional pain undiagnosed, not treated, denied, suppressed, or ignored could be the cause of your unhappiness, sickness, broken relationships, addictions, weight gain, insomnia, and joyless living? What’s in your “wellness cabinet?” What emotional wounds do you have?
Cuts, nausea, depression and headaches from caused by rejection and heart ache.
The relationship muscle weakness of loneliness. The longer you go without relating closely to others, the more difficult it becomes to reestablish contact with new people, or even get back in touch with the old friends you’ve drifted away from.
Broken bones of loss and trauma can shatter and destroy your life, relationships, career, and health. Your post traumatic stress untreated can cause you to make assumptions about the world and feel that it’s not as safe a place as you once thought. I will continue sharing more of my list 7 points about this message of emotional healing next week in my Master Class “The Filling Station” Sunday, April 25, 3:00 PM (Pacific)…6 PM (Eastern) Today, Sunday, April 18, my topic is “The 12 Seats in God’s Waiting Room” to register, email – JewelMotivates@gmail.com
Upcoming speaking engagements
Wednesday, February 21 – FDIC Administrative Professional Day
God has been “growing” my mind. I have been learning some rough and beautiful life lessons.
I love being a woman on the grow! I am learning to reflect on my past with “Kindsight”, to be compassionate, real, and patient with myself.
Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with those areas in your life where you need to grow.
Don’t ever wander so far away from your true self just to get close to someone else.
A SHIP is designed to take you places. So if your friendSHIP, partnerSHIP, or relationSHIP isn’t taking you anywhere positive and helpful…think…is it time to abandon SHIP?
Some people like to stay busy and distracted or stay in a blame/victim mentality instead of sitting still to reflect, sit with their pain, and heal. Once you are courageous enough to live with the reality of your pain, loss, setback, heartache, regrets, or disappointments, and patterns … you will be in a position to walk the emotional path of acceptance, healing, renewal, and restoration of self-worth and faith.
Too often I hear people saying they are fighting their demons when the reality is they’re fighting and resisting the consequences of their choices.
Could it be life is inviting you to build spiritual stamina, mental health, and emotional wellness?
Until YOU heal…you will be toxic to anyone who tries to hire you, collaborate with you, befriend you, or love you.
Are you willing to examine your thoughts, patterns, relationships, choices, and emotional capacity to cope with stress?
Positive thinking and faith do not work unless you understand the roots of your beliefs and behaviors. You can’t ignore your past conditioning, experiences, trauma, fantasies, expectations, and cultural programming. Once you accept your shadow self and all the many versions of YOU, your AWARENESS becomes your superpower to begin transforming your life.
For that someone who has the courage to speak up, armor up, and NOT return to that person or habit which is your “Egypt” (a place of bondage, i.e. addiction, shame, anger, dishonesty, debt, pride, abuse, self-harm, family secrets, or a dysfunctional relationship)… I encourage you to keep walking into your place of promise, freedom, and peace. Stay in the light. Getting help can help you overcome the darkness and break unhealthy patterns.
call 323.964.1736 or email – JewelMotivates@gmail.com to reserve your one-on-one video conference with Jewel Diamond Taylor, aka The Self-esteem Dr.
Jewel Diamond Taylor’s Speaking Calendar
March 21 – She is Well Book Launch and Virtual Summit (Maryland)
Do you feel like you are under attack? Do you feel blocked instead of blessed? Do you know the winning ways of spiritual warfare? Do you know how to fight the exhaustion, fear, confusion, doubt, and emotional traps? Are you isolating, defeated, sick, exhausted, angry, or fearful all the time?
“Master…help them to see their way out, become stronger and make it through. I pray, your gentle spirit rains down to refresh those who are weary. For You, alone, are the great comforter and our liberator from the prison of hopelessness. Remind them you correct and protect, guide, and provide. I give thanks in advance for their ability to breathe again, believe in your promises, refill their cup of faith, and experience their breakthrough.
“May the God of hope FILL you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with the hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” ` Romans 15:13
Register now for my Emotional/Spiritual Wellness weekly “FILLing Station” experience via zoom.
“The Filling Station is the best way to describe this virtual webinar. Every week I look forward to “Filling Myself” spiritually and emotionally. I’m so grateful to have pulled into this station of my life to get the tools necessary for my life’s journey. Thank you Women on the Grow. Let’s keep growing together for His glory!” – Valerie Vaultz
“The Filling Station has ministered to me in so many circumstances in my life. I am evolving every week. I leave the Filling Station feeling filled up with a new attitude and gratitude for Jewel Diamond Taylor’s inspirational and educational message.” – Diane Hale
“I’ve been attending Jewel’s Filling Station on Sundays for 8 months now. She has shared so much wisdom on relationships, divorce, grief, to name a few. It’s an amazing fellowship with everyone. For me at first, a broken relationship, I was stuck from a three year break Up. She gave me tools to find my joy again. Jewel and everyone are so transparent , encouraging, and loving. I’m so thankful to be apart of the group. Thanks Jewel AMEN” –
“I’m co-signing too! The Filling Station has made such a huge difference in my life also! Thank you Jewel and all the ladies!“- Tracy Edmonson
At first, you may feel selfish, embarrassed, stress, or mean when you start to have boundaries. It will take time and determination. Protect your self-esteem, time, body, energy, goals, money, and peace of mind. One day you will thank yourself for finding your voice and value.
1. EMOTIONAL BOUNDARIES (examples of what you can say)
a. I am not comfortable talking about my; past, weight, lifestyle, grief, decisions, surgery, emotional pain, recent conflict, job, etc. right now.
b. (In the case of avoiding drama, conflict, or awkwardness…”I will not be able to attend, but thank you for asking me.”) c. I do not deserve to be treated or talked to like that.
d. Gossip, secrets, drama, trash talk and intense conversations are emotional dumping. I am not your dumping ground.
2. TIME BOUNDARIES (examples of what you can say)
a. I can’t help you right now. I need to stay on schedule and focus. I have some commitments to keep. Is Thursday a good time for you?
b. If you are going to be late, text or call me.
c. I would love to attend, but I have a prior commitment I want to honor.
3. PHYSICAL BOUNDARIES (examples of what you can say
a. If you need to use my things, please ask first.
b. I feel disrespected and uncomfortable, you can’t touch me there. c. Thank you, but I am uncomfortable hugging or shaking hands. I’m not ready for intimacy.
4. MONEY BOUNDARIES (examples of what you can say)
a. Because of my money priorities and obligations, I cannot answer your request. I will be praying with you that your needs will be met.
b. If I do choose to help, it is a loan and not a gift. c. I do not discuss my income with others. I will not ask about yours.
5. RELATIONSHIP BOUNDARIES (examples of what you can say)
a. My relationship with my spouse, children, boo, ex, or parents are not open for discussion.
b. I know you care, but it is my personal business.
6. TOPIC BOUNDARIES (examples of what you can say)
a. I don’t discuss my politics, religion, or personal business here.
b. I don’t think that was funny or appropriate.
written by Jewel Diamond Taylor, aka The Self-esteem Dr.
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CALLER: Jewel I am used to giving and showing up for others but I find it difficult to let others in and see my hurts.
JEWEL: Unfortunately, many women like you are used to being the giver and ignoring their own needs. How are you feeling? What shall we focus on today?
CALLER: I feel like I am not enough in so many areas in my life.
JEWEL: Did something happen to you recently or in your past that caused you to feel this way?
CALLER: When I was a child I was sexually molested. I told my mother but she didn’t believe me. I was dismissed.
JEWEL: No wonder you feel invisible and lack trust in others. Your inner child adapted to her trauma, betrayal, and feeling unheard by shutting down and not feel worthy of asking for help…especially when you felt unprotected by the main person you thought would help you and she didn’t. So why would you expect total strangers to help you?
CALLER: I tried so many ways to earn her love and they never seemed to be enough. I have college degrees and other achievements and I still felt like I was never good enough. She was a drama queen and my siblings and I were like a stage for her performances. Later as an adult, she did apologize for not being the best parent when I was a child. I do forgive her.
JEWEL: In spite of your “gold stars” you became a people pleaser and silent sufferer. You buried your hurts alive and now they are surfacing because you need to transform your thinking and re-parent yourself. You’re not alone in becoming an adult craving your mother’s love and attention to no avail. As you pour your time, money, energy, achievements, hopes, and tears into someone who is also hurting, it is like pouring into a bucket that has a hole. You can never do enough to fill or satisfy her. Many of us suffer from multigenerational patterns of abuse, neglect, secrets, separation anxiety, etc. It didn’t start with you. It started with your mother, her mother, and her mother and so on. We have some work to do and I am grateful and honored you trust me, my experience, and my dedication to empower my sisters.
To reserve your one-on-one time with Jewel Diamond Taylor, The Self-esteem Dr.